You’re familiar with the term personal growth, right? Of making the shift in our thoughts and beliefs in order to live a happier and perhaps more fulfilling life? Many of us do that, making those shifts happen, over time. What then of the body/mind connection? Does it go to follow if we’ve done the internal emotional work, the external physical will follow?
As much as we might hope so, only to a certain point.
Years ago, a friend commented that my posture was as if I didn’t want to be seen. She was right, for most of my life I existed in an internal/external battle between wanting to be seen and being afraid of being seen. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to be seen, but more precisely, I didn’t know how to be seen. You see, like many kids growing up in a family where alcoholism and emotional abuse was occurring, I grew up feeling invisible.
My posture reflected the emotional coping mechanism I’d subconsciously developed of flying under the radar. Despite my height, I tried being smaller in order to divert attention.
When the physical exterior no longer matches the emotional interior
Now, as an adult, who has done extensive work to heal those wounds and change my thinking, the exterior no longer matches the interior.
Certainly, my body has benefited from the interior work. The physical pain associated with a bulging disc pressing on my sciatic nerve, diminished and disappeared as I took the necessary action. By removing myself from toxic relationships this emotional move was what was needed for me to allow the physical healing to take place.
What’s left though, is the postural structure of years of feeling powerless. Research, such as that done by Amy Cuddy, tells us if we feel powerless, our bodies reflects that. We hunch our shoulders, our head is down and forward, limbs close to our torso.
Perhaps you’ve heard the saying – as the twig is bent, so grows the tree?
Reclaiming my stature through feeling worthy
The bent twig is such a true reflection of my life. As early as 9, I recall being scolded to straighten up. I have a life time of my body responding to feeling small and worthless. Now, I am more than ready to take my power back into my body. To do the “physical renovation” that will have me standing tall and strong.
What does this mean? As part of my personal leadership- taking full responsibility and accountability for my life, I am going to find a modality that can help me change my body. Not for vanity’s sake, but for health and happiness. I want it to reflect how I feel now, not when I was powerless and small.
At 5’10 I want to claim my space and feel the confidence in doing so.
I’ve never been much for pictures, but as part of the process, and for accountability, this is going to be important for me to document. Whether I’ll show it to all of you, well, we’ll see.
I know how I’ve changed inside. I feel it in the opportunities I take and the risks I embrace as I finally live the life that’s been waiting for me. Welcoming this next challenge, is one small part of that.
Time to create a greater physical presence in the creation of you
Which leads me back to you.
Are there steps you need to take, physically or emotionally that will better reflect the life you’re leading, or wish to lead? I hope by now you know that none of this happens in a huge swoop, but rather in consistent small steps.
One foot, or one thought, after another.
We’re approaching the last month of the year, why not make it the beginning of something great? You, fully becoming you.
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